Friday, March 26, 2010

The one thing I am saved from, I fear?

John 5:24 states "I tell you the truth, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be condemned; he has crossed over from death to life." I have crossed over from death to life. How encouraging and mind boggling is that?! Should I not desire to see my Savior, the sole provider of that Life through His own death? I should and I do. I desire to see my Savior face to face. To be overflowing with a joy I can only dream of. I desire that greatly, but I also fear leaving this wretched world. I fear leaving those I love. I fear not finding those I had hoped believed in the ultimate Hope. I fear Owen will not be there, waiting to be held once more by his earthly mother as he sits in awe of his Heavenly Father. These are all fears that burn in my heart, fueled by Satan himself. Even when I know this to be true, I fear. I fear for others that I might lose, as if they were mine to begin with. I know that I am only 25, and God is only beginning the refining process. But as these flaws and impurities boil to the surface, I often find myself wondering when they will evaporate away to reveal the pure. When will I fear no longer? When will I, like my dear friend facing health problems later in life, find a peace that comes only through that refining. I suppose I have yet to face my many trials. I have yet to see His purpose in those which I have faced thus far. I have much wisdom to gain from His scriptures... and so the pot slowly boils away. The sifting and skimming continues on. I am confident in my God and know that at the right time, I too will make peace with my fears and the only fear left will be my rightly fear of God the Father. I cherish that thought as I pray for those I long to selfishly hold near. God, you are infinitely GOOD!


1 Peter 1:3-9 Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade—kept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God's power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time. In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls.
LL

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